Sunday, May 04, 2008

OK- who's responsible for this?

I was cruising today adding tons of CDs to my wish list, as usual, when I came across this.

No clips posted on Tower, so I bop on over to Amazon, where they have them. Unfortunately, meh.
Also unfortunately, it is accompanied by barf-inducing cutesy copy like this:
"Rockabye Baby! transforms timeless rock songs into beautiful instrumental lullabies. The soothing sounds of the glockenspiel, vibraphone, melltoron and other instruments will lull your baby into a sweet slumber.
Do you have a problem child? Rock and roll ain't noise pollution, but unwanted cries are. When you're up to your neck in exhaustion and dirty diapers, AC/DC's primordial anthems are just the ticket to ride on. Your little live wire will be rocked to sleep by these gentle instrumentals. For those about to nap, we salute you.

And worst of all, the music is boring as hell. I think you can have lullabye versions of these and other rock songs that don't completely sap the music of all its life.

Then I notice that this Rockbye Baby thing is a whole series of CDs: Led Zeppelin, Ramones, Metallica, Radiohead, Coldplay, No Doubt, even Pink Floyd!
No why would you NEED a lullaby rendition of Dark Side of the Moon? These are just another manifestation of the Baby Industrial Complex, it seems to me. I bet a large portion of these are given as shower gifts in the "you're not losing the ability to rock, you're gaining a little head-banger, dude!" mode.

The reviews by owners of these CDs are pretty funny, though. They seem to swing wildly between "these are great!" and "this sucks!".

I'm glad my kids are past the lullaby stage at this point, we just make our seven year old sampler CDs of things we think she should hear (maybe another post on that later). She is lobbying us hard for an iPod, though.

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